tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post4378569745876388854..comments2023-08-09T12:26:07.061+01:00Comments on The Third...: Trustworthiness3rd...http://www.blogger.com/profile/13719722967344319274noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-53711880053289163352008-07-17T01:37:00.000+01:002008-07-17T01:37:00.000+01:00I am not in a polygamist relationship, but my husb...I am not in a polygamist relationship, but my husband husband would like to be, when he can find the right woman to join our family. However, I have read over and over again that trust becomes a real issue in polygamist families where each wife has her own home rather than everybody living in the same house. With each wife having their own home, it keeps the "this is mine, that's yours" mentality going, which feeds the jealousy issues. Since my husband is actively seeking a sisterwife for our family, I am trying to be sure I am as educated and prepared for the situation as possible. Anyone have any input?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-9882824402222494702008-07-02T00:31:00.000+01:002008-07-02T00:31:00.000+01:00I can't say it better than these elequent ladies h...I can't say it better than these elequent ladies have. Be trustworthy to them and in time you'll get it back insha'llah and if not at let you get the reward big time.American Muslima Writerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17494763839971976761noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-63335413765453936472008-06-30T15:41:00.000+01:002008-06-30T15:41:00.000+01:00All your posts were really valuable.. Big thanks t...All your posts were really valuable.. <BR/>Big thanks to Lady Nomadica for putting her two cents into the slot :)<BR/>And I agree totally with Dee and Elijah Sue that we should try and be trustworthy ourselves before demanding anything of that kind from others. <BR/>I actually am inclined to be just like faceless niqabi, trusting everyone, untill proven wrong. But once proven wrong, I find it very hard to get back to my open and trusting self. It's not as if I hold a grudge, but I do not totally get over it either... it's a process as Lady Nomadica said. I have to keep working on it.3rd...https://www.blogger.com/profile/13719722967344319274noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-85275388711752033632008-06-28T17:12:00.000+01:002008-06-28T17:12:00.000+01:00Being able to trust another to whom I care for com...Being able to trust another to whom I care for comes so easily and MANY times it leaves me so vulnerable. No matter how much I am telling myself that I am fine if CW does not want to deal with me then I am okay with it..knowing that I am truly not okay with it..<BR/><BR/>In all I hope that you are able to come to some sort of a conclusion.gr8fultohimswthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12630609820374802858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-86075760964893113112008-06-28T17:06:00.000+01:002008-06-28T17:06:00.000+01:00I'll leave the issue of trusting others alone..Eve...I'll leave the issue of trusting others alone..Everyone has the right answer for themselves.<BR/><BR/>There is only one right answer for become a trust worthy person ourselves. Be Trust Worthy.<BR/><BR/>Be honest, Be selfless, Be giving, <BR/>Be true to oneself. Offer no harm to others. <BR/><BR/>Easier said than done, but if you are truly trying, than people will see it.Deehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10415072191240494741noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-7710234113036835112008-06-28T16:29:00.000+01:002008-06-28T16:29:00.000+01:00I agree totally with Lady Nomadica. Like I mention...I agree totally with Lady Nomadica. Like I mentioned I tend to trust readily without given precedence to how my gut feels. My husband keeps telling me about doing this Alhamdulillah (Praise and Thanks to God) now I will listen.Faceless Niqabihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08244174572557865954noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-91038099966604198812008-06-28T16:16:00.000+01:002008-06-28T16:16:00.000+01:00I tend to trust everyone until they prove they sho...I tend to trust everyone until they prove they shouldn't be trusted. <BR/>I agree with how Wikipedia defines "trustworthiness"...<BR/>Trustworthiness is a moral value considered to be a virtue. A trustworthy person is someone in whom we can place our trust and rest assured that the trust will not be betrayed. A person can prove his trustworthiness by fulfilling an assigned responsibility - and as an extension of that, to not let down our expectations. The responsibility can be either material, such as delivering a mail package on time, or it can be a non-material such as keeping an important secret to himself. A trustworthy person is someone that we can put our worries and secrets into and know they wont come out In order for one to trust another, their worth and integrity must be constantly proven over time.Faceless Niqabihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08244174572557865954noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-72537070424006961532008-06-28T07:12:00.000+01:002008-06-28T07:12:00.000+01:00Hi 3rd,I'm going to put my 2cents into the slot. ...Hi 3rd,<BR/><BR/>I'm going to put my 2cents into the slot. <BR/><BR/>Trusting is a process, not a virtue.<BR/><BR/>It's part of getting to know others and it isn't either all or none. A sign of good boundaries and development is that you don't rush to give it, or not give it at all. This is something that others can't force from the outside. You really need to trust yourself with this one. Hubby my have his wishes and they may all come from a good place within him, but I really think you should listen to yourself on this one. <BR/><BR/>Listen with your heart and don't try to speed things up for him. You're are sensing some blocks and that is normal and healthy. Keep sensing and pace yourself as to how much you want to stand still, approach, or step back. I think you need to give yourself major credit. <BR/><BR/>This isn't about an outcome that is satisfactory in Hubby's eyes, rather a process that you put your best and righteous efforts towards.<BR/><BR/>Good luck. Keep posting!!<BR/><BR/>Lady NomadicaEsotericahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11125246476503375009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-2909697142094135102008-06-27T21:10:00.000+01:002008-06-27T21:10:00.000+01:00trust is a big issue, especially amongst "sister-w...trust is a big issue, especially amongst "sister-wives". Sometimes even a slight hint of dishonesty can put flags up. What has to be realized now, is that this is family, and although you don't have to be best buddies, it helps, and it also is a benefit for the family. Trust is seems easy to gain, and hard to re-build.<BR/><BR/>Men also fail to realize that women are very intricate, delicate, fickle creatures. Sometimes they may push for something, that we aren't ready to do, and most women will rush to please their husbands.<BR/><BR/>Take people for face value, deal with them accordingly until a situation arises, and shows you otherwise, until then be kind :)<BR/><BR/>come check me outAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4772985086227453517.post-68510690225592971132008-06-27T18:04:00.000+01:002008-06-27T18:04:00.000+01:00that is a really good question. I wonder the same ...that is a really good question. I wonder the same things. I mean I trust CW to an extent but I am always afraid she is going to turn around and tell on me...not that I do anything worthy of telling but do you understand? I like her and I want to build a friendship and some days I see us doing really well but then there are other days where I just miss the boat and don't get it......I feel like she wants a friendship with me for the sake of Allah and for hubby but it is really hard for her and that bothers me alot. She says we are the same family but then she turns around and its like I do not exist....if I do not call her we would never talk...Sometimes I feel like giving up on the whole idea of family and friendship but then I can never give up....I must keep trying to build something together....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com