Thursday, March 26, 2009

Megan's blog

I've been reading Megan's blog..and I am just amazed by the way this household works and how the wives deal with each other. It really seems too good to be true. First off what I like about her family is that they're very religious. They're Christians, and have somewhat weird rules, like women wear dresses and have long hair..which is just a bit weird, not shocking or anything.. Men can have more than one wife but they have to have the means to take care of them – cheers for that.

So Megan just decided she wanted to live in a polygynous family, and she’s 18. Can’t really grasp why she came to this conclusion at this age, but her blog suggests her childhood has been rough, her dad is in jail and she feels her life now is wonderful compared to what she came from.

She came in contact with her current family through online forums or something similar, and they invited her over to stay with them and meet the family and after three weeks she married the hubby Steve. Steve is in his forties and has a first wife also in her forties, a second wife who’s 28 and now Megan. Something about being 18 and taking such a huge step, after a few weeks, made me feel wary of this whole story.. but Megan writes about Steve asking her is she was sure and asking her to think things through, first and second wife asking her if she really wanted this and that she did not need to do anything she wasn’t sure of, the pastor assuring her she needed not to rush into this, and that she could get married now but have her night with Steve in the future… Ok, so I believe all these people have good intentions..

There’s more amazing stuff to be read there, I won’t give you a summary of everything, but the way they deal with intimacy just leaves me speechless:
Megan gets married to Steve, nice ceremony, second wife even sows the dress for her.. Then Megan has her wedding night. They do make love, and Steve is a 100% gentleman according to Megan, then in the morning first wife brings them breakfast in bed. Now, I just can’t imagine this ever happening in my life, or me even wanting this to happen. Amazing first wife if you ask me. First wife and second wife even tell Megan that it is normal for Steve to spend some extra time with her now since she just entered the marriage, so she gets several nights in a row.. They ask her if she is all right, she only had a very brief and unfortunate experience before with a guy and is basically still a virgin. Second wife even gives tips.. (Mind-blowing)
Steve one night after dinner gives Megan the eye and they retreat to the bedroom.. and everyone knows why.. when they come back second wife jokes and asks if they had a nice chat…

I really think this is good family, with a good husband and great wives, I just don’t get how they do this. I think if Mr.Hubby gave 4th the eye at dinner I’d be insulted. And if he gave me the eye in front of others I’d be inhibited..
How come these wives don’t feel any awkwardness when it comes to intimacy?!
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Monday, March 16, 2009

Update from the front line

Sooo... the major, possibly life-threatening, do-or-die, the world is upside down, it might come tumbling down, DECISION - has been taken.

1st gets one day and the other day is for me and 4th. We can decide whether we want three days in a row in one week or if we want to have two days in one week and then one day in the other..I figured last option was better. 4th agreed, which was a relief, I didn't feel like dealing with her horrendous alter ego. Why is that? Why do we all have these terrible alter ego's? And I mean, we all have them.. they s*ck. Big time. And it s*cks that they seem to call each other out to play. 4th invites her alter ego over, and then mine creeps out of the house as well. And this time I locked the door safely, but it really is no guaranty for any future success. Alter ego’s stink. They stink!

Ok.

Got that off my chest.

Now; my blogroll is out of date. My intention was to have a blog roll with interesting polygyny-related blogs, with the exception of Pastoral Princess, she’s my special girl since she was my first commenter ever.. (hugs to princess) …however, many have private blogs (including princess), or have disappeared, or have stopped writing. Anyone has any suggestions??
Out of desperation, I am adding Margene’s blog to my blogroll - the blog of a totally inexistent person, but whatever.
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Friday, March 6, 2009

Polygyny Battles

I'm quite tired..had a few hours of sleep. It's been hectic in the past days. Any of you watch Big Love? The new season is airing now, and … the coincidence is very weird … Nicki (2nd wife in Big Love) said she wanted to be taken off the schedule in the last episode.. now the same happened to us last week. 2nd said she wanted to be taken off the schedule…

I wrote earlier that she has been dealing with her past, getting counseling, trying to resolve her issues. The past months have really been a rollercoaster for her. She said she just wants some time to sort things through without being in the midst of all the family issues. She wanted some time alone..

I wonder what will happen in the next episode of Big Love when Nicki’s wish lands in the family. Within our family it’s been stormy weather.

Mr.Hubby was very understanding. He knows where she’s coming from and said he would be there for her, regardless of whether she was on the schedule or not. He gave her all the space she needed. So we followed his example.

Now this sounds quite good, right?.. well… so 2nd gets taken off the schedule, everyone is very understanding, we leave it at that, till the next day, then the 1:1 talks with Mr.Hubby start.. there are two days per week left unassigned now .. who will get what?

1st sais: I had seven days and I gave that up when 2nd joined. If she won’t have them I should have them. I signed up for seven days and sacrificed my time with you for this family. 3rd and 4th signed up for what they have now, they should be content with that..

4th starts being her “Baby Boss” self. She never had much time alone with Mr.Hubby, she thinks it’s unfair, she always has to accept everything from the rest..

And I… I just don’t even want to be part of this nonsense, and tell Mr.Hubby that he should try to find a fair solution and let me know what it is, I’ll accept whatever he comes up with.

You see.. the issue starts out with two days that need to be fit into the schedule. But it ends up with being about what everyone has sacrificed, how unfair they are treated by others, what they deserve..
What a mess. I’m happy 2nd wasn’t involved in all the aftermath. She is trying to work on her own problems and I believe her decision might have been a wise one. She text messaged me if I wanted to go out to dinner tonight..it’s been a while since she felt like going out.
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